Walking In The Autumn Sun Of My Life

In reflection of my life’s  pathway, all is lost and won, I have walked this far. Regrets of my thoughts and actions in past life fade away, as the unseen creation beckons me to new beginnings, the ever decreasing circle of physical life, aware that now I am walking in the autumn sun of physical life.

The time has come to prepare for the winter of physical life, as the sun will surely set one day, now is the time to gracefully accept old age, and take things easier, I floated on the breeze of life, never settling as my self illusion took me on many a wrong path, life and love all so confusing, when the lie becomes more favourable than the truth.

Knowing, living, speaking, writing, my truth with open heart for all to see and share, is not enough in this material world of money and possession, as I seek to settle somewhere, to write and create, with my lady to love and home comforts to share.  As I and we gradually fade away, on life’s physical pathway.

Stephen Rowlands 31 – 10 – 17 

 

 

 

Fill Your Hearts With Love

I went along one evening to a spiritual development circle, run by my friend Kevin Trefry, he said to me your not going to sit there and do nothing, I want you to give the meditation. I was a bit put out by this as I was very tired, and in need of recharging, I just wanted to just sit and enjoy the closeness of spirit. And do some of the mediumship exercises with the students, as I feel it is important to keep developing, and to maintain and strengthen our links with spirit, so I asked my spirit guides, what would be the best meditation to give to the circle. My spirit guide Jerome a Franciscan Monk came forward, and said ask them, to draw unconditional love from God into there hearts, to fill there hearts with unconditional love.

After the opening prayer I asked the students, to visualise the love of God, coming from above in white light, filling their hearts with divine unconditional love. The meditation began, myself and Kevin watched over the students, after 10 minutes or so I called the students back from their meditation, and I asked them each in turn, what they experienced during the meditation, and they all felt very empowered, and a great connection to all things, The lesson in the meditation is that love is the power of all things and is our connection to all things, the next day Jerome came to me, and inspired me with a poem, from the previous nights meditation.

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Fast forward to 22/10/17, I was inspired to give Jeromes poem as a reading at the divine service Jennings Street Christian Spiritualist Church Swindon. The poem was well received by those in attendance, Jerome then went on to inspire me with the address from the poem, he inspired me to say that love is a choice, as everything in life is a choice, out of the vast range of emotions that we can feel, love is the emotion that we rarely choose, when we are faced with some form of adversity or negativity in life. We tend to rely on our base instincts such as anger, confusion, jealousy, a loss of self worth. When people are horrible to us, or we make a mistake in life through our choices in life, all this comes from our ego our pride kicks in, and we react seeking to hurt those who have hurt us, or anger when our plans go wrong, making the situation worst for ourselves and those around us.

Let us step onto the back foot rather than reacting with hurt, let us seek the solution to our problems with love, and ask ourselves what is the best solution to this problem with love, rather than always choosing our base instinct ego, to solve our problems, causing greater disharmony to the spirit of ourselves and others, when we think feel and act with love, we are connecting to our higher selves, our soul the true part of us, that lives within what we call God, whilst our spirit lives and learns through our minds and bodies, in this material world of the earth plane. Love is a great spectrum of all emotion, at its lowest level we have hatred, anger, greed, jealousy, avarice, sloth. at its highest level there is divine unconditional love.

We spirits who live and learn in this physical and material world, find ourselves going up and down the sliding scale, of the emotional spectrum of love, let love be our choice in all things, to heal our hurt feelings and calm negative situations, let love be our guide, not only with family and friends, but in all things and with all peoples, and in doing so we are putting ego in its place, and making life better for ourselves and all around us, helping us to find the inner peace we so often crave, when I first got into spiritualism, I was taught it is a big part of our spiritual development, to turn negative into positive that is why we are faced with negativity and adverse conditions at times, I truly believe we are here to learn how to love, that is our spiritual purpose for being here, the ascended masters who teach through the religions who adopted them, they all teach love its about time we all pricked up our ears, listened to the teachings of love from the masters, take those teachings within ourselves and live them, because surely we are all fed up with the terrible things that are going on around us and in the world, it needs us to make love, kindness, compassion, tolerance, Our way of life and truth.

THANKYOU FOR READING

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Whilst writing this blog, I was taken back to the time when I used to sit on the back doorstep, at home in Langley my nan would be cooking Sunday dinner. I would be writing inspired notes for the address for the service that night, I have walked through 2 dark nights of the soul in life, and in the dark night I missed those times, but feel very blessed right now those times are now back. With me so I say to all who feel they are walking in darkness, be true to yourself, love yourself, love life no matter how dark it gets, and the sun will rise again.

NAMASTE

 

Pictures On My Wall

Returning home weary, after a long week at work, negative emotion gnawing at my guts, anger turbulent within my mind, like the most violent lightening storm. I remind myself I am at home now, and that I am so blessed to have a home, on this cold wet and windy night.

My flat warm and cosy as can be, I change into my comfies, so good to be home, away from the corperate ego driven bullshit, that pays my bills, my home is my sanctuary, where I can breathe and be me.

Lying on my bed,  candlelight illuminating the colours of my flat, looking at the pictures on my wall, telling the story of my past and present, a feeling of amazement washes over me. Wow this is my life, for the past 7 years, pictorial memories of holidays family and friends, my spiritual pathway, looking at me from my wall.

The summer day of my higher self, now calming my storm, reminding me it is not good to dwell, in self created negative of ego, the mind should always seek, the truth in heart, now I am glad I took the pictures on my wall, showing me where I have been, and where to go with blessings, thankyou pictures on my wall. 

Stephen Rowlands 21/10/17

My Grieving For Dad Helping Me To Become A More Compassionate Medium

For many years I could never understand why people, would be so sad for the loss of their loved ones in spirit, their grieving causing them so much emotional pain, and sadness years after their beloved ones, had passed over the veil into spirit. The people I speak of are spiritualists, I stood beneath the spiritualist banner there is no death, and I wrongly felt that the knowledge of the truth there is no death, would be comforting enough for the pain and sadness of grieving,  to cease but because I had not suffered the loss of a loved one, I did not understand the emotional kaleidoscope of grieving, even when people were getting messages via a medium, from there loved ones in spirit the pain and sadness still remained with them.

Whilst in spiritual development circle, an oriental spirit guide known to us as Li, came through his channel Ian Watts in trance, as he often did to give us some teaching of universal life in spirit. In his talk he was saying that we should not mourn our loved ones in spirit, as it is only the physical loss of our loved ones that we grieve for, and this to him grieving for our loved ones was selfish of us to do, he accepted that when we first lose a loved one there should be a period of mourning for the physical loss of the loved one, he went on to say that our loved ones are now in a realm of light, and are  living within the divine energy of universal and unconditional love. We should be happy for them and allow them to continue, there journey in spirit as they are truly now spirit, and we should love them as spirit beings, and not selfishly mourn their physical loss, over a long period of time.

I held onto Li’s teaching for years believing it was selfish to grieve, for the physical loss of our loved ones, although I never spoke of this teaching as I believed, it would cause more hurt to those who had lost loved ones, it is my role as a medium to bring upliftment to others through spiritual teachings, but looking at Li’s teaching from a spirit perspective, his teaching is correct  and I believe that this teaching, should be given totally from a spirit perspective, to those who are emotionally ready to receive it. As I have often thought we never see things from spirits side of life, and how it effects them in their interactions with us on earth, and in doing so this makes us the selfish ones.

Sadly my Dad passed over the veil into spirit 14/10/15, although his passing was expected as he was very ill, I stood by his bedside with my mother at Wexham Park Hospital, the doctor had just pronounced him physically dead, I held his hand and his voice loudly spoke to me in my head in his voice, “LOOK AFTER YOUR MOTHER” which was totally my Dad as he worships the ground my Mum walks on, my brother arrived and we said our farewells to my Dad, we went back to my mothers I was stunned it was as if time had stood still, but life was going on as everybody and everything was going about their daily business, I raised a glass of whiskey and ice Dads favourite drink to say cheers thanks for everything to him, Dads funeral was arranged for 03/11/15, to give friends from overseas a chance to assemble for his funeral, I took Mum to see Dad in the funeral home, as I stood over Dad in his coffin there was the real sickening energy of physical death, permeating deep into my gut, a feeling that stayed with me for a very long time, my mother said it is so cold in here Elwyn doesn’t like the cold, as she touched his cheek I said Mum he is not here this is just his shell, I took my mother home and prepared Dads Eulogy, as I was nominated to give it, as I was used to talking in front of people, my family sees that I have my uses.

                               SIGNS

The week after my fathers passing to spirit, I had three demonstrations of mediumship to do, I debated with myself whether I should do them or not, as I was an emotional and mental wreck functioning only to be strong  for family, and cope with the rigours of my job, I made the decision to cancel my platform bookings, I knew the churches would understand. Queen was my dads favourite band, I got into the shuttle bus to go pick up staff, I switched on the radio The Show Must Go On by Queen, came blasting out of the radio this could only have been my Dad, as he was a very selfless man, and wanted his children to live life to the full, you may scoff but I know this is the truth.

I have often thought that the belief that our loved ones in spirit, leave a penny when they are near to be a fairytale, a few weeks after my Dads passing to spirit, I called out to my Dad, come on Dad if you are near give me a sign. I proceeded to hoover my flat, I had hoovered every square inch of my flat, as I was putting the hoover away, I looked down and there was a shiny penny looking up at me from the floor. How could I have missed that my flat is tiny, I couldn’t have missed it, no its just a fairytale, in the morning I walked down the bottom of the stairs, opened the door to go to work, and there was a shiny penny looking up at me from the paving slab, now I believe spirit leaving pennies as signs to be true.

                     REALISATION

My dad makes his presence felt most days I speak to him every morning, but I still miss him wish he was still here to talk to and share a joke with, and yes Li that makes me selfish, I live in the physical world where we need our loved ones near, we need their physical presence, as much as it is wonderful to receive a message from our loved ones in spirit, nothing can take away our need to have them physically with us. As a medium I have given the messages and watched the tears flow, there is nothing I can do to dry those tears, the spiritualist message of there is no death, has failed, but with compassion and spiritual teaching we can comfort and uplift.

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TWILIGHT THOUGHTS: Navigating A Energy Shift In Service And Life 17/09/17

 

Sitting talking in the twilight smoking a cigarette, chilled wine on table, my Veronica lying beside me on my bed, we are watching A Midsummer Nights Dream. A lovely Sunday evening once upon a time I craved moments like this, but the past is gone I sit here now  within the moment feeling blessed, my road has led me here to this moment, writing my thoughts to share.

The last few weeks have been hard for me on a emotional level, where I have questioned my progress in life, my being and where I may progress to in life. With past memories showing me all that I was, there must be an answer to my visions of yesteryear, to where I am now through this gloomy grief, my heart finally grieving for my beloved father, so much I wish I had discovered about him as a person, when he was here on earth with us. With sad regret I wish I had realised my dad, was a spiritual man and wandering star his favourite song, a song that I love to.

Something happened to me that day 06/08/17 just after service, at The House Of the Good Shepherd Spiritualist Church in Uxbridge. A church that holds so many memories for me, I used to serve there in the mid 1980’s as a young medium, I have a strong memory of giving the chairpersons sister. A message from a young boy who tried to swim across the River Thames, in wartime London but he drowned halfway across, the chairperson Evelyn cried it was her son.

Standing in the church about to take my Veronica home, a powerful vision within my minds eye, of me as a young 25 year old man standing in the church, looking straight at my 57 year old self, now weary on this road of life, a lump came into my throat, I wanted to cry why I wanted to cry has caused me much pondering, my younger self had so much energy, discovering himself vocation found.  lifes journey has led me back into spiritualism, a yearning to reach my lifes purpose and full potential weary of trying to prove myself, as it is a whole new world in modern spiritualism. But press on I must as Spirit keep telling me, my niche in this new life is coming, patience is not my strong point, but patient I must be, my emotions have been all over the place, is this the massive energy shift of the divine masculine and feminine, manifesting here on earth, I have really been questioning myself, my sexuality, and my place in this life, and what I need to become.

My link with Spirit has become stronger, as I have been doing more trance work, so I was confident when I headed to The Boudoir in Soho London, 10/09/17 to demonstrate mediumship to a LGBT audience. Who I must say were very welcoming and friendly, a very atmospheric venue I was sure the demonstration would go well, the organiser of the event was expecting me to prove survival after death, but alas my demonstration was mostly psychic, although the messages given were very accurate and well received, there was one lady who could place two elderly communicators from Spirit, and the message they gave her, but to the organisers dismay I worked mostly on a psychic link, and made her feelings known to me. All I could put it down to was the fact that I have been feeling down of late, Spirit tend to work more psychically when the channel is feeling low,  I do feel  strongly to say that messages from Spirit Guides, are still good evidence as they tell us of things, that are going on around us, and that to me is still evidence of survival, Spirit Guides were once people who walked the earth, and can see what is going on around us, so to me there messages are evidential proof of survival. Where else would I or any other medium get that information from, and I ask why should messages from Spirit Guides be termed as psychic, the organiser did say she booked me to demonstrate mediumship, and I feel I did as it was billed as a psychic event, I can see the irony in it, the difference between psychic and mediumship needs to be clarified.

I again stood in at The House of The Good Shepherd Uxbridge, 24/09/17 as the booked medium had cancelled, my Spirit Guide Jerome communicated a thoughtful address, and loved ones communicated there messages, with accuracy, love, and humour. A total contrast from the demo at The Boudoir, this energy shift is effecting me on all levels, I hope now things are beginning to settle, as I have found it most challenging, and I hope a better me will emerge  from it, for now I continue my journey of psychic mediumship and self discovery.

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